Weird Crime Wednesday: The Proof is in the Pudding
Framingham, Massachusetts
The last 12 months have been pretty rough on 21-year-old David Blanchard. He and his girlfriend, 20-year-old Adriana Laurano, have been arrested twice: In March of 2013 for resisting arrest and in June for throwing rocks at a car. In David’s defense, however, the people they were throwing rocks at had blown an air horn at them…but he also beat up a disabled person last year, too, so you shouldn’t feel too bad for him.
On February 22 of 2014, however, David officially changed from being “short tempered and possibly just unlucky” to “severely deranged.” After being arrested (again) for shoplifting at Kohl’s, Blanchard’s bail was set at $2,500. He probably should have expected this due to having a record, but it apparently pissed him off enough to call his lawyer…or somebody else.
Actually, none of the reports on this incident reveal who he was trying to reach. What they do say, however, is that Blanchard refused to inform the person on the other end of the line that the call would be recorded. This resulted in police terminating the call, which in turn set off a massive chain reaction of crazy.
Blanchard kicked things off by immediately assaulting two nearby officers. After being put into his cell, he attempted to choke and hang himself with the t-shirt he was wearing.
This is normally the part of the story where I’d move on and find something else to write about. It’s hard to bring my brand of substandard, snarky humor about something as tragic as a person trying to end their own life (even someone like this guy). But what he did next, however, was equal parts hilariously ballsy and unbelievably disgusting.
.
I suppose they’re now going to make yummy sausage from his poop?
Sounds like a real ‘pillar of the community’.
Fortunately we all have different ‘tastes’ when it comes to what we like to snack on.
Well, one things for sure, the guy’s full of s#&t.
Seems like a good candidate to become an Obamacare navigator.
Massholes continually eat shit.
And like it.
That’s why they’re Massholes.
Had a call like that, guy rolling it into little pellets and eating it. Called the psych wagon for a pick up ’cause no way was I letting this guy into my car.
This guy brings the concept of “organic food” to a whole new level.
Not to change the subject but how can you be arrested for resisting arrest? Wouldn’t there have to be other charges before you resist arrest?
I believe this is normal behavior in Taxachewshits. No?
Wouldn’t want to be this guy when the other well adjusted people in jail find out he will literally eat shit.
He’s no doubt related to that guy who hid in the womens porta potty wrapped in plastic. The cops got into a fight as to which car he was going to jail in.
lol… “Havana Omelet”
Cop said he has bad breath, too.
Guy looks like he could be in a textbook, about evolution.
If Obama had a son who ate his own shit, he’d look like David Blanchard.