48 Comments on This must be a government building…
I wonder what that traffic study cost us.
Biden: “At LAST somebody found the stair instructions! It was lost for 3 months and in that time we were all banging into each other! Now, if we could only re locate that recipe for ice cubes.”
If you stay on the right going up and the left going down, your still gonna run into each other cuz you’re both on the same side of the stairway.
Gotta be bureaucracy … or higher education.
They’d prefer you to sit on the steps when peeing, too.
Thas RAY-CYST!
Why come gotta be right going UP and left coming DOWN?
I thought teh stupid was only supposed to hurt the people that have it?
This could work in a M.C.Esher building.
not certain about that today.. should have sent a text to ensure everyone read the message.
Clear as mud I tell ya.
…and entirely staffed by progressives!
Also, remember, when you’re driving north, stay to the right. When you’re driving south, stay to the left. This will avoid head-on collisions.
Put this sign up in your building!
Hilarity will ensue!!
an example of what the Left does to the Right
The signs in the Bathroom impart wipe direction wisdom as well.
They got part of it correct, those of us on the right aspire to rise or raise up while those on the left are heading down.
This lacks definition. What happens if you forgot something and need to reverse direction? Do I just back up or should I turn left or right? I’m confused. We need to create and submit this to a committee of totally incompetent people. Preferably in the lobby.
Look, I’m gonna explain these stair instructions one more time, and then we’ll resume our game of “Heads – I win, Tails – You Lose.”
“Due to the very low compliance
with last week’s stairwell directive,
stairwells shall be used for descent only.
Going up the stairs is prohibited.
“We will repair the elevators just
as soon as the budget is drawn up,
approved, and funds appropriated.”
Your CORE right, damnit!
A government grant to study why people are still bumping into each other will be coming soon. I feel that we must be in line for this grant. I know there are people here that can fix this travesty and injustice.
@Bad_Brad – If you forgot something and need to go back for it, simply walk backwards on the opposite side if you were originally going down, or on the same side if you were going up.
Clear? (-:
Oh, MOE TOM, you figured it out!!!
Uncle Al, I need more clarification for the dues and don’ts of possibly sliding up or down the OSHA approved banister.
Due to the amounts of complaint recieved reguarding the stairway saftey derections, we are now monitoring the situacion.
New derective to fallo, tomorrow. Meenwhile fallo last derective. as it behoves you to do.
As per Bad Brad.
@Bad_Brad – Simple. From 12:00 a.m. Monday through 12:00 p.m. Wednesday, banisters are for sliding up. From 12:00 p.m. Wednesday through 12:00 a.m. Friday, banisters are down only. No sliding on weekends.
This only applies to banisters with pigeon spikes installed. Plain banisters may not be used for any purpose until fitted with spikes.
If the power goes out while on the escalators, please remain calm. Help will arrive shortly
Do the stairs flush differently in Australia?
It makes perfect sense; if you walk backwards down the stairs.
Uncle Al. I just checked in the employee safety handbook under “Banister Usage”. While it specifically addresses wooden slivers and splinters there’s no mention of “Spikes”. I think we’re good.
At the NSF(National Science Foundation) 5th floor bathroom…
WASH HANDS BEFORE AND AFTER YOU USE FACILITIES
No sh*t Sherlock.!
@Bad_Brad – Whew!
Olde Irish toast….”as you slide down the bannister of life, may the splinters all face the correct direction”…
But…but…but…what if you’re south of the Equator?
On a Thuesday?
@norman e – South of the Equator? Walk on your hands, silly!
And you wouldn’t be in a govt building on Thuesday because you’d be taking Thanksgiving week off, natch!
Uncle Al. I think we should report Norm for not reading the damn manual. He can thank us for his pay raise later.
@norman einstein
Don’ worry abut the stairs on Thuesday, just soak up the free beer.
Is this note for an escalator?
I always wondered how people knew how to use them.
OK Who’s got the video of the two progs on the escalator that just stops. And they just stand there yelling for help? Anyone?
Thanks, guys. I knew you’d be able to splain it for me.
I’m not good at some of this stuff.
Always going in through the ‘Out’ door, etc.
@Moe Tom, here ya go:
…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kq65aAYCHOw
After the results of the study on the challenges of duo-directional stair travel, management has observed the necessity of further study to empower our employees. Starting next week each employee will be given a stairwell ambulation tracking device in the interest of identifying stairway directional ascent and descent patterns.
Following that will be focus groups that will utilize Shame Therapy in identifying repeat offenders and separating this group from the preferred brand drones we aspire to fast track into management.
Oh, and don’t forget to drive on the right side of the road on the way to work and on the left side of the road on the way home…..
Norman you are a genius. Thai’s it.
Hey Tom. Shhhhh. I think Norms a back door man. Que The Doors.
On Navy ships, one of the first things you learn about ladder traffic, (for the uninitiated, a stairway is called a ladder at sea…), as well as in all the myriad of passageways, is the acronym FUSPAD… Forward, Up & Starboard, Portside, Aft, and Down. That prevents traffic jams when the ship goes to General Quarters…and considering that a Nimitz class has 11 decks between the keel and the flight deck, and 8 or so more in the Island, you have to have some way to get people where they need to be quickly in an emergency.
Needs to be posted on the boarding stairs for Air Force 1
Great thread. Lots of original thinkers. Threads like this are why I’m here.
I wonder what that traffic study cost us.
Biden: “At LAST somebody found the stair instructions! It was lost for 3 months and in that time we were all banging into each other! Now, if we could only re locate that recipe for ice cubes.”
If you stay on the right going up and the left going down, your still gonna run into each other cuz you’re both on the same side of the stairway.
Gotta be bureaucracy … or higher education.
They’d prefer you to sit on the steps when peeing, too.
Thas RAY-CYST!
Why come gotta be right going UP and left coming DOWN?
I thought teh stupid was only supposed to hurt the people that have it?
This could work in a M.C.Esher building.
not certain about that today.. should have sent a text to ensure everyone read the message.
Clear as mud I tell ya.
…and entirely staffed by progressives!
Also, remember, when you’re driving north, stay to the right. When you’re driving south, stay to the left. This will avoid head-on collisions.
Put this sign up in your building!
Hilarity will ensue!!
an example of what the Left does to the Right
The signs in the Bathroom impart wipe direction wisdom as well.
They got part of it correct, those of us on the right aspire to rise or raise up while those on the left are heading down.
This lacks definition. What happens if you forgot something and need to reverse direction? Do I just back up or should I turn left or right? I’m confused. We need to create and submit this to a committee of totally incompetent people. Preferably in the lobby.
Look, I’m gonna explain these stair instructions one more time, and then we’ll resume our game of “Heads – I win, Tails – You Lose.”
“Due to the very low compliance
with last week’s stairwell directive,
stairwells shall be used for descent only.
Going up the stairs is prohibited.
“We will repair the elevators just
as soon as the budget is drawn up,
approved, and funds appropriated.”
Your CORE right, damnit!
A government grant to study why people are still bumping into each other will be coming soon. I feel that we must be in line for this grant. I know there are people here that can fix this travesty and injustice.
@Bad_Brad – If you forgot something and need to go back for it, simply walk backwards on the opposite side if you were originally going down, or on the same side if you were going up.
Clear? (-:
Oh, MOE TOM, you figured it out!!!
Uncle Al, I need more clarification for the dues and don’ts of possibly sliding up or down the OSHA approved banister.
Due to the amounts of complaint recieved reguarding the stairway saftey derections, we are now monitoring the situacion.
New derective to fallo, tomorrow. Meenwhile fallo last derective. as it behoves you to do.
As per Bad Brad.
@Bad_Brad – Simple. From 12:00 a.m. Monday through 12:00 p.m. Wednesday, banisters are for sliding up. From 12:00 p.m. Wednesday through 12:00 a.m. Friday, banisters are down only. No sliding on weekends.
This only applies to banisters with pigeon spikes installed. Plain banisters may not be used for any purpose until fitted with spikes.
If the power goes out while on the escalators, please remain calm. Help will arrive shortly
Do the stairs flush differently in Australia?
It makes perfect sense; if you walk backwards down the stairs.
Uncle Al. I just checked in the employee safety handbook under “Banister Usage”. While it specifically addresses wooden slivers and splinters there’s no mention of “Spikes”. I think we’re good.
At the NSF(National Science Foundation) 5th floor bathroom…
WASH HANDS BEFORE AND AFTER YOU USE FACILITIES
No sh*t Sherlock.!
@Bad_Brad – Whew!
Olde Irish toast….”as you slide down the bannister of life, may the splinters all face the correct direction”…
But…but…but…what if you’re south of the Equator?
On a Thuesday?
@norman e – South of the Equator? Walk on your hands, silly!
And you wouldn’t be in a govt building on Thuesday because you’d be taking Thanksgiving week off, natch!
Uncle Al. I think we should report Norm for not reading the damn manual. He can thank us for his pay raise later.
@norman einstein
Don’ worry abut the stairs on Thuesday, just soak up the free beer.
Is this note for an escalator?
I always wondered how people knew how to use them.
OK Who’s got the video of the two progs on the escalator that just stops. And they just stand there yelling for help? Anyone?
Thanks, guys. I knew you’d be able to splain it for me.
I’m not good at some of this stuff.
Always going in through the ‘Out’ door, etc.
@Moe Tom, here ya go:
…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kq65aAYCHOw
@Norman – Can that be any more racist AND sexist?
I’m not sure if that will work.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29BoqCMRBFk
I’ll have to think about it some more.
After the results of the study on the challenges of duo-directional stair travel, management has observed the necessity of further study to empower our employees. Starting next week each employee will be given a stairwell ambulation tracking device in the interest of identifying stairway directional ascent and descent patterns.
Following that will be focus groups that will utilize Shame Therapy in identifying repeat offenders and separating this group from the preferred brand drones we aspire to fast track into management.
Oh, and don’t forget to drive on the right side of the road on the way to work and on the left side of the road on the way home…..
Norman you are a genius. Thai’s it.
Hey Tom. Shhhhh. I think Norms a back door man. Que The Doors.
On Navy ships, one of the first things you learn about ladder traffic, (for the uninitiated, a stairway is called a ladder at sea…), as well as in all the myriad of passageways, is the acronym FUSPAD… Forward, Up & Starboard, Portside, Aft, and Down. That prevents traffic jams when the ship goes to General Quarters…and considering that a Nimitz class has 11 decks between the keel and the flight deck, and 8 or so more in the Island, you have to have some way to get people where they need to be quickly in an emergency.
Needs to be posted on the boarding stairs for Air Force 1
Great thread. Lots of original thinkers. Threads like this are why I’m here.