This must be a government building… – IOTW Report

This must be a government building…

hmmm

48 Comments on This must be a government building…

  1. If you stay on the right going up and the left going down, your still gonna run into each other cuz you’re both on the same side of the stairway.

    Gotta be bureaucracy … or higher education.

  2. This lacks definition. What happens if you forgot something and need to reverse direction? Do I just back up or should I turn left or right? I’m confused. We need to create and submit this to a committee of totally incompetent people. Preferably in the lobby.

  3. “Due to the very low compliance
    with last week’s stairwell directive,
    stairwells shall be used for descent only.
    Going up the stairs is prohibited.

    “We will repair the elevators just
    as soon as the budget is drawn up,
    approved, and funds appropriated.”

  4. A government grant to study why people are still bumping into each other will be coming soon. I feel that we must be in line for this grant. I know there are people here that can fix this travesty and injustice.

  5. Due to the amounts of complaint recieved reguarding the stairway saftey derections, we are now monitoring the situacion.
    New derective to fallo, tomorrow. Meenwhile fallo last derective. as it behoves you to do.

    As per Bad Brad.

  6. @Bad_Brad – Simple. From 12:00 a.m. Monday through 12:00 p.m. Wednesday, banisters are for sliding up. From 12:00 p.m. Wednesday through 12:00 a.m. Friday, banisters are down only. No sliding on weekends.

    This only applies to banisters with pigeon spikes installed. Plain banisters may not be used for any purpose until fitted with spikes.

  7. Uncle Al. I just checked in the employee safety handbook under “Banister Usage”. While it specifically addresses wooden slivers and splinters there’s no mention of “Spikes”. I think we’re good.

  8. After the results of the study on the challenges of duo-directional stair travel, management has observed the necessity of further study to empower our employees. Starting next week each employee will be given a stairwell ambulation tracking device in the interest of identifying stairway directional ascent and descent patterns.
    Following that will be focus groups that will utilize Shame Therapy in identifying repeat offenders and separating this group from the preferred brand drones we aspire to fast track into management.

  9. On Navy ships, one of the first things you learn about ladder traffic, (for the uninitiated, a stairway is called a ladder at sea…), as well as in all the myriad of passageways, is the acronym FUSPAD… Forward, Up & Starboard, Portside, Aft, and Down. That prevents traffic jams when the ship goes to General Quarters…and considering that a Nimitz class has 11 decks between the keel and the flight deck, and 8 or so more in the Island, you have to have some way to get people where they need to be quickly in an emergency.

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