There’s a video ad from Lammily, the company that makes a doll that teaches young girls about having their periods, that could be among the worst cringe-inducing pieces of crap ever produced. The parents, naturally, are morons, embarrassments, clueless and incompetent. It makes one wonder how they’ve provided the wonderful house the daughter is sitting in.
But forget all that. You know what I want to see? I want to see an “honest reality-based” video where parents have a talk with their little transgender child and explain how they won’t be buying the Lammily doll because they will never be menstruating.
I’m going to produce a different doll for the parents that want to push their mentally ill child into believing they’re a woman. My doll will be called Anomaly.
It will have a detachable scrotum and a penis that can be inverted. It’ll have bolt on tits, handfuls of hormones, some collagen injections, Adam’s Apple scrapers, a pitch control for the voice box, and a psychiatrist’s couch.
ht/ Twitter: @JasonChisel
17 seconds of the video was all I could take.
Where did they get that ‘dad’ actor?
Even SNL couldn’t come up with such a creepy ‘father’.
Seriously? Periods suck. Pretend to make it fun with a doll and your teenager will only hate you all that much more.
We get to have babies which is awesome but the other 425 months or so doesn’t make so hard to believe in the whole apple in a tree punishment thing.
You made it seven seconds longer than I did
I’m afraid to ask what substance they used to create the faux menstrual discharge.
I thought the babies that peed were weird, this reaches a whole new level of strangeness.
Oh boy. I think this is worse than the breastfeeding baby doll.
Does it bitch for five days?
What’s next abortion Barbie, the kid gets to abort the fetus.
Hanger sold separately.
is there an accompanying Fisting Ken doll ?
Bolt on tits may have a market.
What the hell are these idiots thinking? I suppose the term innocent childhood is a concept that they don’t have a clue about.
What’s next…post menopausal Barbie visiting cranky Ken and his enlarged prostate at the urgent care center?
Above was me again (GFY).
No, the next atrocity will be a male doll that ejaculate into poor Lammily.
Soon to be released: Incontinent Barbie.
You wouldn’t believe what I thought “GFY” stood for until I looked back up at your screen name…
;}
No, but it drinks wine coolers and weeps a lot.
Don’t forget Bulimic Barbie.
I’m going to market the elderly Ken Doll. Ken thinks he’s about to fart, but he gets a chocolate starfish surprise.
™Sharting Ken
How about a talking Menopause Mary Doll where you pull the string and she bitches all day long
But of course. 🙁
Not only should he fart, but belching would be a plus.
I can hear the announcer now: “Sharting Ken – sponsored by Hershey’s Chocolate Syrup…”
Five’ll get you ten Lammily’s a spitter.
Or an Obama doll with a big dick shoved up its ass.
Or a “69” doll of the Pope and Obola.
with a “Crying Boehner” on the side.
maybe that should be a “weeping boner?”
or “dripping boner?”
You refill her with Heinz catsup…
The little tykes can lick the syrup off Sharting Ken’s legs!
Satan has us by the balls, that is all there is to it.
I hate to think where the string is!
I did not realize they were making dolls with a uterus now. I suppose “Abortion Barbie” is next.
When are they going to make an All American Amazon Brigade doll to fight alongside the GI Joe Action figures?
I get that a lot.
@Tim — that may be the entire point of this. Use some sugary substance that the kids will want to lick and they’ll think it’s okay to do for real when they get older.
With any luck, the girl’s pediatrician will set her straight. Maybe.