Funded by a government.
In his quest for a simpler life, one man has transformed himself into a goat.
He’s studied goat behaviour, learned their way of communicating and even attempted to create an artificial goat stomach to allow him to eat grass.
His efforts, funded by the government, culminated in a three day trip to the Swiss Alps, where he lived as a goat, roaming the hills with a herd.
But living as a goat, Thwaites soon found, wasn’t as easy as he’d expected.
The prosthetics were painful, the landscape was tough and Thwaites was constantly battling the cold.
Those challenges, however, were nothing compared to the task of convincing the herd he was one of them.
‘It’s much easier to walk up on my prosthetic front legs. So I ended up quite high on a hill surrounded by goats,’ he recalls.
‘That was possibly a goat faux-pas, because it shows dominance by how high in the herd you are.
‘I looked up and all the other goats were looking at me. Everyone else had stopped chewing and it was in that moment, when I thought, “those horns look quite sharp”.
Fumb Duck.
Kick him and see how good his grip is on those rocks. If he’s goatworthy, he’d know what to do.
If the ass was a whole lot bigger I’d say he used Mooch as a pattern.
So, that’s his goal in life?
Sucks to be you.
“His efforts, funded by the government”? You mean taxpayers, right?
The hardest part was avoiing the horny muzzies.
He should be fooken rammed!
“Thomas Thwaites, a 34-year-old (lacking the smallest vestige of common sense and ridiculed by damn near everyone) researcher from London…
Geez, Louise, what a retard. He wants to BE a goat, but he’s wearing clothes. Come on, take those off and grow body hair. What? You can’t? You’re cold? I reiterate, What a retard.
I noticed he didn’t do it in the Saudi desert or Iraq or Syria ……. he at least knew better than to tempt the mohamedans. He coulda been the ram-ee (or is it rammette) instead of the ram.
Well he’s taken the correct position.
He’s just channeling his inner Nebuchadnezzar by going insane and pretending to be a goat. Except that the real Nebuchadnezzar was driven crazy by God, this idiot is doing it on his own. What a maroon!
In goat language, he’s bending over and dropping the soap.
‘I initially wanted to be an elephant, but it wasn’t going very well,’ said Thwaites. ‘I visited a shaman, and she said “you’re an idiot”. So, I decided to be a goat.’
Wouldn’t it be a sha-woman? She did call it, though. He is an idiot.
He’s hopping for Allah’s scud!
Where’s ISIS when you need a grant?
I wonder if he pisses on his beard? You do know that billy goats do that. Now, here’s a true story:
There’s this particular highway that we travel at least 3 times a week. This guy has a herd of goats on a small lot. In this lot is a fiberglass camper shell. We see the goats standing on top of it and we laugh each time we go by. Then, the camper slowly started to disappear. The freaking goats were eating the camper! There was nothing left of camper, they devoured it in 3 weeks time, every bit of it. I can only imagine how hard was it for them to take a crap. Ugh!
Might I suggest he live as Cecil next time. Or if he can’t live up to that, then maybe Cecil’s brother.
Goats are like cats with the brain of a chicken.
Goot luck, ya goot.
oh, for fuck sake
How about that assbite in Alaska who wore a bear suit and harassed a mother bear with cubs?
http://www.kwwl.com/story/29784367/man-in-bear-costume-harasses-bears-in-alaska
What the hell is wrong with these people?
I have no idea what made me think of this but .. Did he wipe his butt with the fake goat things on his arms? or did he just leave his ass dirty?
What if Bruce Jenner is a female goat? That would be a twofer!
This guy’s ass is mountain lion bait. Grizzly too. lol
The hills are alive with the sound of dumbf*ck.
He’ll be the next Darwin Award recipient.
Too many Disney movies I’ll bet!
He might enjoy this more if he was a female goat.
You mean the government would’ve funded Jim Breuer? He’s going to be pissed.
Dan Rather (remember that asshole?) would goat rope (?) him.
My name is Rumplegoatskin…I’m virgin number 1.
This is a clear cut case of Trans-Animalism. Where a person identifies with animals and bravely seeks out empowerment and camaraderie from those of the species they identify with by attempting to live with them.
Most die of exposure in their various environs, however relatives have the solace that their relations died doing what they loved.
There have been successes as well as failures.
Rabbit Girl did fine until winter
The Hyena guy was eaten by the Lion Guy who was then eaten by Hyenas who were eaten by lions.
The Dolphin Lady was rescued from a buoy the very first night
Monkey Boy will never recover
#GoatLivesMatter
I’m guessing he likes sex goat style so they can both watch the Animal Planet channel at the same time…
This news just in: Thomas Thwaites, a 34-year-old researcher from London, was just shot and killed by infamous Trophy Hunter/Dentist Walter James Palmer. Muslim protestors now want Palmers head on a stick.
News at 11