Town Hall
A page on the NBC News website called “Climate Confessions” invites people to tell the world how they have failed to uphold the doctrines of climate change ideology in their lives. It lists several possible misdeeds like wasting food, cranking air conditioning and routinely consuming steak.
“Even those who care deeply about the planet’s future can slip up now and then. Tell us: Where do you fall short in preventing climate change? Do you blast the A/C? Throw out half your lunch? Grill a steak every week? Share your anonymous confession with NBC News,” the webpage says. More
Don’t bother going there, I melted it down this morning. Not enough bandwidth to digest all of my climate sinning.
Eating a big steak I grilled for lunch in my house with the AC cranked down,a little chilly but I put on a sweatshirt. Going to go out and burn some old tires then pour some old used motor oil on the drive to keep the dust down.
I keep thinking things will get so completely idiotic that even hardcore socialists will throw up their hands and say, “okay, that’s ridiculous!” Not so far. No matter how absurd.
(Bows head and slowly walks over to potted plant to confess, soaked with guilt)
My climate change sin is that after I ate a big steak which was harvested by a non-stop farting cow, I took a big dump, used three sheets to wipe my ass instead of the two Sheryl Crow recommended, and had to flush the toilet three times to get that brown downtown. My carbon footprint smells like a corn-fed duece.
“Going to go out and burn some old tires ”
Nelson and Winnie Mandela would be so proud to read that.
As for me, I’m gonna max out the credit cards and fly around like I’m Leonardo DiCaprio
“with the AC cranked down,a little chilly but I put on a sweatshirt”
Who the hell do you think you are – Jimmy, put on a sweater, Carter?
When the air conditioning is a little chilly a real sinner fires up the woodstove*.
*Certified woodstoves are problematic if you are looking to bump down the next lower rung on the ladder to carbonator perdition
Yesterday I washed my hair and I left the water running while I deep conditioned.
I really should go turn it off.
I’m making California switch to 100% electric vehicles sooner than they wanted.
I’ll be running all Earth-produced, not fossil, gasoline engines Sept 21-23 International Car Free Day(s). A rumble in my jungle. And the next day, and the next. No more golf carts with doors!
Didn’t “The Grassroots” do a song about this?
In Climate Change confessions
When I tell all the world that I’m awful
THE CLIMATE RAPED ME!
Are these sins listed in the Bible? Thou shalt not…..
Let’s crucify the false prophets of gloom and doom as long as we’re using Biblical terms.
Callmelennie. Do it..
I like your start to it
Went there last night and left a heartfelt confession. It hasn’t shown up yet to view. Not sure why?🤔
One slight correction to the textbAn incorrect referral is made to “idieology”
.It should be to climate idiotology or sun made global warming.
Thanks,
I’ll cop to farting…profusely…and in their general direction.
Feels pretty F’ing good right now…
I’ll sleep when I’m dead and will not email to let you know.
ffs
The climate wore a MAGA hat and tied a noose around my neck.
Not kidding.
Someone like DiCaprio has a lot of fessin’ to do.
Like riding his yacht that consumes more energy in a day than I will consume in a lifetime into port where he then hops into an SUV with an entourage to attend a climate change conference.
Or maybe that doesn’t count if you’re a blow-hard liberal.
Instead of the Catholic church in Lake Wobegon called Our Lady Of Perpetual Responsibility the idiotic left could have Ma Gaia’s house of worshipping everything in creation but the real God. We could call it Ma Gai’s remorse at everything good. Instead of hail Mary’s for penance they could sacrifice themselves to giant man eating plants as acts of contrition for their sins against the plant world. Dr. Who also had a 5 or 6 episode plot storyline about man eating plants with Tom Baker and Sarah Jane Smith (my favorite of all the Dr. Who babes) fighting a crazed millionaire who wanted to purify the earth with plants and no humans.
I love to have them double bag our groceries at Publix to cancel out the previous earth saver with the canvas bags.
We used to have a young attorney in my old state office who said that when asked paper or plastic bags, he would say, “Whatever screws up the environment the most.”
as I mowed my lawn today, with my environmentally (emphasis on the ‘mental’) correct hand mower, I could feel the grass screaming & pleading w/ me not to chop them up into little bits.
I felt so guilty I went out & bought a scythe … should I have bought a goat? … but, they poop … do they make goat diapers?
oh, the dilemma of being environ-mental & saving Mother Gaia …
(new saying: ‘you can’t spell ‘environmental’ without the ‘mental’™)
IDIOTS.
Back when they asked, “Paper or Plastic?”, I always asked for paper bags. Paper bags are a recyclable, reusable, renewable, ecologically friendly American Made resource, while Plastic bags are made from expensive petrochemicals we purchased from Persia so we could turn them into garbage.
Back then, the Eco-Nazis claimed that plastic bags were superior because they took less energy to produce, and would save the lives of millions of trees…
Now that Sea Turtles and Cattle are choking to death on them, I think the Eco-Nazis should choke on them too. They didn’t give a damn about my concerns 20 years ago, and I don’t give a damn about theirs now.
Now, I put my groceries loose in the cart, and wheel it out to my car where I load them into cardboard boxes for the ride home, and I’ve been using the same boxes for about a year now.